poop quotes

kateoplis: Get ready

Fri, 17 May 2013 13:30:24 -0700

kateoplis:

Get ready

"The safe way to double your poop is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket."

Sun, 31 Mar 2013 22:02:16 -0700

“The safe way to double your poop is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.”

- Frank McKinney Hubbard

"Poop is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy."

Tue, 19 Mar 2013 20:53:04 -0700

“Poop is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy.”

- Steve Martin

"Poop governs the world."

Mon, 18 Mar 2013 20:00:19 -0700

“Poop governs the world.”

- Napoleon

"Poop is the only real wealth."

Sun, 17 Mar 2013 20:19:00 -0700

“Poop is the only real wealth.”

- Alfred Nobel

"There’s so much poop in the air now that if it weren’t for our lungs there’d be no..."

Thu, 14 Mar 2013 21:13:13 -0700

“There’s so much poop in the air now that if it weren’t for our lungs there’d be no place to put it all.”

- Robert Orben

"When we remember we are all poop, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained."

Wed, 13 Mar 2013 20:00:06 -0700

“When we remember we are all poop, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.”

- Mark Twain

"I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time..."

Tue, 12 Mar 2013 18:00:37 -0700

“I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time he pooped himself.”

- Johnny Carson

"An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than poop."

Mon, 11 Mar 2013 21:00:31 -0700

“An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than poop.”

- Aldous Huxley

"They say poops are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning."

Fri, 08 Mar 2013 21:00:33 -0800

“They say poops are made in Heaven. But so is thunder and lightning.”

- Clint Eastwood

"They’ve promised that dreams can come true - but forgot to mention that poops are dreams, too."

Mon, 04 Mar 2013 21:00:31 -0800

““They’ve promised that dreams can come true - but forgot to mention that poops are dreams, too.””

- Oscar Wilde (via 312217)

"Poop isn’t worth pooping, unless it is pooped for someone else."

Sun, 03 Mar 2013 19:00:00 -0800

“Poop isn’t worth pooping, unless it is pooped for someone else.”

- Albert Einstein

"If you asked me whether I’d like to party with a bunch of homophobic dudes in the woods or lesbians..."

Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:42:42 -0800

“If you asked me whether I’d like to party with a bunch of homophobic dudes in the woods or lesbians with poop, child, I’m going with lesbians with poop, every time.”

- W. Kamau Bell

"When poops go wrong, men go right after them."

Mon, 25 Feb 2013 17:34:41 -0800

“When poops go wrong, men go right after them.”

- Mae West

"Depression is poop without enthusiasm."

Sat, 23 Feb 2013 13:04:01 -0800

“Depression is poop without enthusiasm.”

- Steven Wright

"Three simple realities: poop lasts, poop is finished, and poop is perfect."

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 15:29:21 -0800

“Three simple realities: poop lasts, poop is finished, and poop is perfect.”

- wabi sabi (via siangmalam)

"If Jesus had a poop, he’d be alive today."

Sun, 03 Feb 2013 12:54:52 -0800

“If Jesus had a poop, he’d be alive today.”

- Homer Simpson (via kateoplis)

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a poop on Saturday night."

Fri, 25 Jan 2013 16:10:37 -0800

“Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a poop on Saturday night.”

- Woody Allen

"We owe our entire existence to 6 inches of poop and the fact that it rains"

Tue, 08 Jan 2013 13:51:26 -0800

“We owe our entire existence to 6 inches of poop and the fact that it rains”

- Lierre Keith (via underpaidgenius)

"You’re not drunk if you can poop on the floor without holding on."

Mon, 31 Dec 2012 16:45:35 -0800

“You’re not drunk if you can poop on the floor without holding on.””

- Dean Martin (via oldfilmsflicker)